I woke up in the morning after my 30th birthday to a giant goose egg on my forehead and no idea how it got there. I told myself I’d cut back, but when my 31st birthday rolled around, I got absinthe-related amnesia. It wasn’t until a few weeks before my 32nd birthday that I made a commitment that stuck. No more getting drunk. Period. Often, people discuss drinking as an “all or nothing” affair. As soon as you admit that you think you drink “too much,” you’re suddenly a candidate for a recovery program and should be quitting cold turkey. You can have a problem with alcohol, and not be an alcoholic. You can have a problem with alcohol and not want to quit. Sometimes we need to see our experiences reflected back to us in order to feel comfortable making a change. The problem with the “all or nothing” approach to alcohol is that many of us don’t relate, and rather than be labeled as addicts, we stay silent about our desire to change. We face pressure to drink in social situations. The people around us may not be comfortable with their own drinking habits, which can make your decision to do things differently even more loaded. You could lose a friendship, or a business relationship if you rub someone the wrong way on a night out. But isn’t it more important to be someone you feel comfortable looking at in the mirror every day? If any of this resonates with you, consider this permission to make a change—an affirmation that your truth is real. Here are twelve signs that made me realize it was time to consider redefining my relationship with alcohol. Low-risk drinking is considered to be no more than 2-3 drinks per day with no more than 7 drinks per week for women, and 3-4 drink per day with no more than a total of 14 drinks per week for men (depending on which country’s guidelines you are looking at). Your version of moderation might look like no more than one glass of alcohol on any evening, committing to more alcohol-free days during the week, or choosing not to drink in situations that are potentially triggering. Whatever you decide, create a plan before you’re in the situation you’re worried about. Know what alternatives you have (nonalcoholic drinks, or bringing your own). Do your best to set yourself up for success and focus on the benefits you’ll receive.
