Whether it’s a picture of you that you think really captures your spirit, a prompt about your favorite hobbies or interests, or even coming right out and saying, “I’m looking for a long-term relationship,” the people that align with what you’re putting out there are going to be the ones matching with you. “There can be kind of shielding or discomfort around those things—old programming that if you put these things on your profile you’ll appear more needy in some capacity—but I view it as really embodying and emboldening our desires,” Artschwager adds. As Artschwager tells mbg, these niche interests are what make you you. And anytime you feel a compulsion to dim yourself in some way on your profile, that’s probably the very thing you ought to lean into. “There’s this idea of needing to portray a certain persona, so anywhere you think you need to portray something, or you don’t want to share something, run toward that,” she explains, adding that showcasing who you really are is where the magic happens. The key here, she adds, is not that you’re looking for someone to have the exact same specific interests or ideas as you but rather, she notes, people will be attracted to your obvious and inherent nuance, depth, and, yes, quirkiness.
